Iron Man and Me

For all kinds of reasons, today is the day that I write about why Iron Man is my favorite superhero. Avengers Endgame will be here at the end of the week (but I won’t see it until Sunday). Iron Man might not survive this one. I hope that isn’t the case but if it is, I wanted to get my thoughts down before seeing the movie. This year also marks the Tenth Anniversary of my graduation from seminary and ordination into the ministry. (Being a pastor also plays into why Iron Man is my favorite superhero.) This post might sound like a self-reflective essay- I apologize in advance if I bounce around between several ideas.

In my childhood, I fell in love with certain kinds of characters. I loved medieval knights with their armor. I loved the idea of advanced technology, cyborgs, and robots. And I loved characters that used their intelligence to outsmart the opponents (I was academically gifted and I associated with them). Early in my superhero fandom, I liked the Iron Man character. At first, this was based on the armor, the weapons, and also the intelligence of Tony Stark. Iron Man met all my qualifications and eventually became my favorite. He is a modern knight in shining armor. His armor and weapons are based on very advanced technology. And he is one of the smartest people on earth. His intelligence is usually what leads to victory.

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In Iron Man 3, Tony is suffering from PTSD and anxiety attacks after the events of the first Avengers movie. At one point, he runs out of a restaurant, gets into his armor, and asks Jarvis if he is having a heart attack or if he has been poisoned. Jarvis tells him that he was having a severe anxiety attack.

There are other events that happen which show that he can be overwhelmed by the magnitude of the problems he is facing. He has a tendency to focus too much on work when he is stressed out (he builds 35 armors in a short amount of time and goes 72 hours without sleeping). He is very driven to accomplish his goals and he likes to be a lone gunslinger. This led him to create Ultron in the second Avengers movie.

I could go into further detail about Tony’s personality but I am actually writing to confess how I match up with Tony. As I have grown older, I have found that I am more like Tony than I originally thought. First of all, I have suffered from anxiety, and at times, anxiety attacks. I’ve heard of anxiety attacks being mistaken for heart attacks. Perhaps you guessed it, I had two emergency room visits because I thought there was a problem with my heart. I have had times when I felt like I was going to pass out in a stressful situation. I have had times when I get very overwhelmed by all that needs to get done. At times when I am stressed, I become more focused on tasks that need to get done and I prefer to do them by myself because I don’t want someone else to get in the way.

I have sought out many solutions to deal with my stress and anxiety better. In an effort to get past them as Tony did, I’ve talked to medical doctors and counselors who both encouraged me to continue running (my sixth full marathon is in June). It actually does give me stress relief to watch my favorite superhero movies. Even though I really enjoy watching Iron Man on screen, I understand that I can’t really get relief by emulating Tony Stark. I wish I could have one of the armored suits but I highly doubt that is going to happen.

Some of the best relief I have is from my God. I fully understand that my anxiety issues may never go away this side of heaven. But the joy of the resurrection is the most helpful stress relief I can have. I honestly wish that every day felt like Easter Sunday. When I left worship on Easter Sunday, I felt great. When I lead worship on Easter Sunday, I probably have a smile on my face for the vast majority of the service. Easter is the mountaintop experience that helps with our lives. The victory is mine. Jesus won forgiveness and eternal life. I get the benefit from it.

I think about what Paul says in Philippians, “I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation” (Philippians 4:11). I know the joy of Jesus and this helps me to be content. I might not always be happy or stress-free, but I am content because of my forgiveness and eternal home. Paul also says, “Be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power” (Ephesians 6:10). My strength comes from my God. I might not always feel strong. I might feel extremely weak and my body will fail at times, but true spiritual strength comes from God. I rejoice because of Easter. I wish every day was as joyful as Easter. I know that many of my problems will persist this side of heaven. And yet, I am comforted by the resurrection of my Lord Jesus.